America!, we need to talk. Up until very recently I had a lot of faith that America! would do the right thing and end our relationship with the type of politician who promises you a romantic steak dinner but then texts you while you’re waiting for him at the restaurant table saying that LOL he forgot because he got really into this game of beer pong with the guys and OMG that promise of a steak really got blown out of proportion so please try to forgive him and maybe he’ll ping you through Facebook next week. The America! I knew would have egged that bastard’s SUV and distributed a viral video depicting his expert nose picking skills. But now? I feel like we’re all “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me three times, shame on the media.” I’m afraid that the wrong people are going to win this November, and what’s worse I think we’re all apathetic enough to simply shrug our shoulders and say “Eh, it’ll all be the same load of crap no matter who we elect.”
NO! America! Don’t roll over in submission like this!!!
Sure, Obama and McCain are kings of spin. All politicians are. And yes, we’re sick of spin. Sick! How many more times can we stand to hear another generic yet politically correct statement that is all pomp and no substance?! How on Earth do we get past this cycle of hysteria over inconsequential things like how much a person’s suit is worth?! Well, I’m sad to say that we’re a little far along in this campaign season to abruptly end the spin, but I am hopeful that after this election some progress can be made. Hey, look on the bright side: There’s no national hysteria over a fictional monster like the Monkey Man that harassed India back in 2001. Oh, wait. We did just have a Bigfoot hoax that garnered intense media coverage. Nevermind.
Where was I? Oh, yes…
Obama spins change! and hope! and how he possesses a very modern view of society! McCain spins security! and values! and prosperity through tapping our own resources! Worthy buzzwords. We see Obama as the liberal, McCain as the conservative. Many people will consider those generalities and deem them enough information on which to base a vote. But I implore you, America! to look deeper than that. Consider the men themselves; the things they’ve said and done, beyond the rhetoric and campaign slogans.
Here is an unbiased portrait of John McCain. Lengthy, but worthy: “McCain’s Party”, by Connie Bruck
Now, an article about Obama, by the same publication: “The Conciliator”, by Larissa MacFarquhar
Both politicians have their merits. McCain the warrior and guardian of good old-fashioned American! pride. Obama the unlikely poster child of the American! dream.
Wow, tough pick, right? Not really, as far as I’m concerned.
I present for you an article that is deeply unsettling for me, and sums up my reasons for fundamentally distrusting John McCain: “Maverick Vs. Iceman”, by Jonathan Chait
I also hope that America! will take into consideration McCain’s choice in confidants. We all shook our heads in dismay over the likes of Donald Rumsfeld (now branded a Warmonger!) and Karl Rove (who proved himself a Deceptive Coward!). Can we not see ourselves likewise shaking our heads over Sarah Palin and whomever else McCain would choose to sit in his Cabinet?
Sarah Palin was fished out of the woodwork in a blatant error of judgment. Teen pregnancy, allegations of abuse of power, and suspicions of an affair with her husband’s business partner have already surfaced. She’s a headline grabber, that’s for sure. She’s already drawn the ire of the AP, which published this article, picked up by AlaskaReport.com after her speech at the RNC: “Associated Press says Sarah Palin lied in Republican speech” Great job, McCain. This woman’s more scandal-ridden than Paris Hilton. And frankly? I don’t think she represents me or any other woman I love and respect.
Look, Something Shiny! is not a political blog, nor would I ever describe myself as a person whose opinion on political topics is one of any expert caliber. So, I challenge somebody to please explain Sarah Palin to me. No, don’t explain her to me. Explain John McCain to me. No, don’t explain him to me. Explain the GOP to me. No, no… No. Explain to me why more people aren’t tapping each other on the shoulder and going, “Seriously?”
I don’t care about who is going to raise my taxes or who is going to keep Mexicans from crossing the border. What I care about is putting the best PERSON in office; someone I can trust to make a good freaking decision for once. Pick Obama and he’ll learn, grow, listen, and heal this precious America! that we were once so proud of. Better yet? He’ll lead us FORWARD and not allow us to remain stagnant in an America! that has been embarrassed by our idiot President, increasingly hated by foreign countries, and financially ruined by corrupt and greedy government officials and corporate leadership. America!, we got ourselves into this mess. Let’s get ourselves out.
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